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Protective Layers and Mechanisms Series (Part 4 of 4)

September 24, 2021

Now for the final part of the series. My realization and the release of the shadows.

What I’ve finally realized is by continuing to embrace my protective layers I was keeping myself from truly being all of me. You can’t hide and be in plain sight. At some point, you have to decide it is time to let your protective guardians relax and breathe. You have to let them stand down from being on high alert if you want your light to shine and if you want to stop living in the shadows. Because that’s what the layers do. They cast shadows and darkness. As I said, we were born into this world with all our potential at hand. We learned through different experiences to step back from them and shield ourselves in the shadows. When we remain in the shadows for too long we can forget who we are at our authentic heart. The layers we have buried ourselves in don’t let the sun’s golden light shine in to warm us. When we allow that light in we can reconnect with ourselves and say … “ah, there you are.”

I consider myself very blessed and fortunate because even though I adapted to this cocoon of my own making somehow I had left enough tiny gaps and a bit of light penetrated. It came to me through a whispered knowingness … “you are meant for more.” At times the whisper was … “you know there is more to life.” I believe we all have a spark in us that keeps burning as we go through our journey. It’s the guiding light moving us forward. And remembering who we are at our essence is one of the greatest choices we can make. It is the choice of choosing who we are and allowing the world to see us. We all have the strength, courage, and bravery to make this choice. It may take us a bit of time and that’s okay because it’s in the constant choosing that moves us forward, that changes our relationship to our protection guardians and dissolves the shadows.

A final thought I will leave you with regarding the protection we have swirled ourselves in … if you wrap yourself completely in a blanket from head to foot what part of you does the world see? It sees none of you. It only sees the blanket. From inside the blanket, what do you see? Maybe a bit of light that struggles through the woven fabric but for the most part it’s dark, shadowy, and somewhat hard to breathe. It might be scary to show the world who we are but isn’t it also scary to live in that dark shadowy place and not be you? You have the strength to loosen the blanket and let more light in. I have found from my experience, as I let my grip loosen I’ve had the most amazing people come into my life and my life has become more of what I knew it could be. I do not doubt as I let go of my grip completely and stand fully as my sparkly self I’ll have the sense of … this is what life is supposed to be.

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